Character Interview: Eric Scott

I hope everyone had a fantastic Thanksgiving. If you decided to venture out today to partake in some Black Friday shopping, I hope you did not get trampled and that you found some worthwhile deals. Today started out rough when I was called into work unexpectedly, but wound up being quite nice because I was able to leave early and go on a little adventure with the family. Fun day, all in all.

Our next character interview flashback is Eric Scott. Here it is exactly as it appeared a couple of years ago:

This week it's Eric's turn to be interviewed on our Sunday interview series. Eric is, of course, the center of the story, and although he has help, it's really all about him (although he doesn't think so). So let's see what Eric had to say during his visit to The Deliverers Publishing Headquarters.

Editor:  Eric, welcome to The Deliverers Publications Headquarters. We’re really happy to have you here.

Eric:  Thank you sir. It’s really great to be here. This place is sweet. Nobody told me you, like, had a mansion for a headquarters. This place is so sick.

Ed.:  Um..okay. I’ll take that as a good thing. So, what was it like to go on an Assignment?

Eric:  It was, like, real strange, but also exciting. I was a little freaked out by Stig at first, but the Gatekeeper was smart to send him, he got my attention. I gotta admit it was scary, but after a while I kind of got used to it. Stig was a big help, too. I kind of felt like I almost grew into the Assignment as I went along.

Ed.:  What was Calendria really like?

Eric:  Well, at first, I thought it was kind of this dumpy little village. I mean, it seemed kind of backward. And the people were all kind of wimpy. They never really tried to fight Sharky. But, you know, I guess they had a good reason. I mean, Sharky was, like, more than 300 years old, so what kind of a chance did they have? But after I got to know everybody there, I think they almost became like family.

Calendria is a great place. I kind of think of it as my second home, now. Life moves a little slower than it does in most of our world. People all know each other. It’s just different.

Ed.:  How were you able to come up with a plan to fight Sharky and his pirates?

Eric:  Uh, I don’t know, really. I, like, just checked out the village. When I saw the harbor, it just kind of clicked. The idea came to me. It was a pretty good plan, I think. I mean, the Lord Mayor and the Council thought so. We were just unlucky. But I don’t think I want to talk about that right now.

Ed.:  What do you think of Stig?

Eric: Oh, Stig’s cool. Sometimes he seemed like too much of a grownup. He kind of wanted to boss Kate and me around a little. But I know he was just looking out for us. Then,  there were times when he just kind of left me alone.  I think he was just letting me get used to the whole Assignment thing.

Stig is now a real good friend. He’s the kind of bird who would do anything for you. I’d do anything for him, too. I’m looking forward to hanging with him again soon. Actually, now that I really think about it, he might be the best friend I ever had.

Ed.:  What do you like to do in your spare time?

Eric: Oh, um, well I used to like to hike, until, well, you know. Now, I like to read, camp out. I like video games, and writing. I like swimming, too. I hope there’s a chance to swim in the next Assignment.

I guess I’m just a regular kid. I like to spend time with my mom. Lately, she’s been a little busy, though. I guess that’ll probably be in the next book.

Ed.:  When Kate was here, we asked her about the rumor that you were more than friends?

Eric:  What did she say?

Ed.: She said that you were just good friends, and that she looked forward to working with you in the future.

Eric:  Oh, uh, yeah. That’s right, just good friends. I do miss her, and Hallo, too. I can’t really explain it, but  when I was in Calendria with Stig, Kate, Hallo, and everyone, I felt, for the first time since my father died, that I belonged somewhere. That I was—happy.

Ed.:  How has the release of the book changed your life?

Eric:  Well, I’ve been trying to keep a low profile. My friends here don’t really believe it, so I don’t really go, you know, advertising it. I’m glad people are liking the book. They tell me that it’s a great story, but I can see that they don’t really believe that it happened.

I suppose that’s good. It keeps me from having to answer a lot of questions. People think I just let you guys use my name. So, I’m kind of a celebrity, but for the wrong reason. It can be frustrating at times.

Ed.:  Yes, well thank you very much for taking the time to sit down with us. We look forward to seeing what transpires in future Assignments. Will you need any help finding your way out?

Eric:  You’re welcome. This place is almost as big as the Dwarf Kiingdom, but I should be okay. Kate gave me some good directions. The only problem is the gallery near the north tower, but she told me where the secret door is.

Ed.:  Oh, rats. Well, shout if you need me.

Character Interview: Kate Endria

Our Thanksgiving/Hanukkah week character interview review continues with the feisty Kate Endria. She is the daughter of the Lord Mayor of Calendria, and an important part of the Deliverers team.

By the way, here's wishing you and yours a happy, healthy, safe Thanksgiving and Hanukkah filled with joy and blessings. Let's all take this time to give thanks for everything we've been blessed with!

Editor:  Welcome to the Deliverers Publishing Headquarters, Kate. Thanks for stopping by.

Kate:  You’re very welcome. This is so exciting! I never thought I’d get to visit this place. Stig told me all about it, but I would never have believed how extravagant your headquarters was if I hadn’t have seen it for myself.

Ed.:  Well, I don’t think it’s as impressive as you’re making it out to be. But anyway, what was your family life like growing up?

Kate:  Some might say that I still have some growing up to do, especially the members of our Council. I remember some happy times when I was younger. Of course, Sharky and the pirates were always around. If they weren’t terrorizing Calendria on Tariff Day, there was always the thought that Sharky was watching.

I remember times with Papa and Mother—before she died. We were happy, going to the Green for picnics, pot luck suppers at the meeting house. But, then Mother got sick, and things weren’t so good. I was seven when she passed.

But, Papa has always been wonderful, and he does his best to make up for my not having a mother. And of course Gretchen, our maid, has always been a dear, and Madame Bottleneck, too. I’ve been blessed to live in a village where everyone cares about one another, and I’m proud of Papa, who’s the Lord Mayor.

Ed.:  Tell us a little bit about Calendria and its history.

Kate:  Well, Calendria has a long and rich history. It was established over 300 years ago by my ancestor, Calvin Endria. Cal Endria had been Sharky’s first mate, but he and about 40 others in Sharky’s band decided it was time to settle down and retire. So, Cal went to the captain and stated his intentions, expecting that Shaky would either laugh in his face or run him through.

I think that he was pretty surprised when Sharky didn’t do either. Instead, he agreed to let Cal and his mates retire, provided that they paid a tariff of half of everything the settlement produced twice a year for a hundred years.

So that’s how Calendria started. Calvin Endria was the first Lord Mayor, and the village was named in his honor. The position of Lord Mayor has been handed down to the eldest son in the Endria family for generation after generation.

Ed.:  You were the one who discovered the Deliverers. How did you come to be searching for them?

Kate:  Well, in Calendria there’s this legend called the Deliverers about a hero and a talking eagle that appear to defeat Sharky and his pirate band. My mother was a big believer in the legend, and she passed that belief on to me.

I took it as my duty as daughter of the Lord Mayor to search for the Deliverers whenever I had some spare time. So, one day, I came across Eric and Stig. As soon as Stig started talking, I knew that I had found the Deliverers.

Ed.:  What do you like to do in your spare time?

Kate:  You mean besides searching for the Deliverers? Well, I try to help Papa with anything he needs. I’m also studying. I hope one day to succeed my papa as the first Lady Mayor. That keeps me pretty busy.

Ed.:  So, what do you think of Eric? There are rumors floating around that the two of you might be getting close…

Kate:  Eric and I are good friends. I’m eternally grateful for what he and Stig did for Calendria. As for anything else, I think he and I are too young to be concerned with that at this point. There’s too much we’re still working through personally. Of course, I look forward to working with him, Stig and Hallo on future Assignments if the Gatekeeper needs us.

Ed.:  I guess that kind of answers my last question. Would you like to take part in future Assignments?

Kate:  Oh, yes. I’m hoping to. I mean, it’s important work, helping others. It’s also dangerous work, but no one in my family has ever backed down from a challenge. I always want to make Papa, and Mother, proud.

Ed.:  I think they are very proud of you, Kate. Thank you again for taking a few minutes to sit and chat with us.

Kate:  Any time. It was really a lot of fun. Is this a new map?

Ed.:  Yes, we’ve adjusted it since Stig visited. You should be able to find your way out of here now.

Kate:  Why, how sweet. Thank you so much.

Character Interview: Stigidae Ghostwing

Okay, since I've been working on the plot for The Deliverers 4, which involves a bit of time travel, I thought I'd go back in time two years or so to my first character interview. Back then, I conducted a survey of the dozen or so readers I had at the time to determine which of the characters from The Deliverers: Sharky & the Jewel I should interview first. The winner was Stigadae Ghostwing the owl--Stig for short.

As I read this interview, it's interesting to see what was said when everything was fresh and new. For those of you who had not yet discovered this blog when this interview appeared right before Thanksgiving 2011, it may prove mildly amusing. Enjoy.

Editor:  Welcome to the Deliverers Publishing Headquarters, Stig. Thanks for taking the time to, um, perch with us.

Stig:  It’s my pleasure entirely, I assure you. I say, your headquarters is really quite impressive.

Ed.:  Oh, how so?

Stig:  Well, the sheer size of the place for one thing, and the fine art and furnishings, to say nothing of all the awards and autographed political and celebrity photographs. I mean, who knew this was such an accomplished organization!

Ed.:  Stop, I’m blushing. But this isn’t about us. We want to hear about you. What was your childhood like?  Were you an only owl?

Stig:  I was an only child. It was rather difficult. You see, my childhood lasted for about 150 years. Most of that time was spent in school. Owls are nothing if not educated. When I wasn’t in school I was with my parents hunting for mice, moles, and the occasional rabbit.

Mother was kindly and very understanding of my youthful foibles. My father was a most respectable business owl, and did not go in for any “carrying on” whatsoever. This led to some friction between us when I entered my adolescent years. I must confide that, just between you and I, I was quite the hellion back in those days. Eventually, I settled down and became somewhat respectable myself, but the entire process was rather painful.

Ed.:  What is your world like?

Stig:  Oh, much like any other, I suppose. Owls are the predominant species. We’ve developed a very learned society, known for our universities. A nice place altogether, but not really my cup of tea. I don’t spend much time there these days, what with my Assignments and all.

Ed.:  How did you first get sent on an Assignment?

Stig:  I first stumbled upon the Hallway of Worlds when I chanced upon a doorway while exploring a cave on my world. This was, let me see, over 100 years ago when I was around 320 or so. I can’t begin to describe my amazement when I found myself in the Hallway.

Then, the Gatekeeper appeared. He seemed to have been expecting me. Naturally, I was skeptical when he told me he needed my help, but I could not deny that I was not in the cave that I had entered, so I agreed to help him as best I could.

That was the first of many Assignments in my service to the Gatekeeper. It took a long time until I was chosen to lead an Assignment.

Ed.:  Let me guess, that was this last mission with Eric, right?

Stig:  Mmmm…Yes. Apparently, the Gatekeeper had his eye on Eric for some time. He asked me to approach him with an Assignment. Mind you, I wasn’t sure Eric would accept. He was going through an extremely rough patch, and had quite a large chip on his shoulder. Thankfully, I was able to convince him, which worked out to everyone’s benefit.

Ed.:  What do you like to do in your spare time?

Stig:  Well, I don’t have much of it, I can tell you. I teach a class at university on my home world every other semester. I enjoy it—it’s a real hoot.

Ed.:  Did you know Hedwig, Harry Potter’s owl?

Stig:  Oh, not that well. We flew in different circles. The few times I did meet her, she didn’t have much to say. Bad show what happened to her, but she died bravely. For me, it underscored just how unpredictable life can be.

Ed.:  How has the release of the book impacted your life?

Stig:  I’ve worked in virtual anonymity for over 100 years, so it was a trifle disconcerting to have the bright light of the media turned upon my work. All in all, though, I must say that it has been surprisingly satisfying. For one thing, it was an excellent Assignment. For another, it gave me a chance to work as part of a team, which was a most singular experience.

Eric, Kate, and Hallo were fun to work with, although a trifle exasperating at times. Each brings their own expertise to an Assignment, and I think we play well off each other. I’m looking forward to working with them again in future.

Ed.:  So, do you think you will all take part in future Assignments?

Stig:  From what the Gatekeeper says, I would think it stands to reason. There are thousands of worlds out there, and more than a few are encountering difficulties, so I would think you could count on it.

Ed.:  Well, thank you for your time Stig. I look forward to reading about The Deliverers’ future Assignments.

Stig:  You’re quite welcome. The pleasure has been all mine. Now, do you think you could help me find my way out of the building? All the passages are quite confusing, and I can’t make head or tail out of the map you gave me.

A Writer's Week #93: Making Progress

This week has been very satisfying for me. First off, my request for book donations from authors that I have been privileged to meet over the last years has been generous to say the least. Thanks to C. Lee McKenzie, Celia Carlisle, Kimberly Sentek, Karen Pokras Toz and Tracey Lynn Best for offering to donate books to the Danbury, CT Salvation Army's Christmas Distribution event. Thanks to you, a bunch of children in need will receive the gift of reading.

After a week, I've got 36 books. I need to reach at least 100 by December 13th. If you would like to help, purchase a copy of one of my Deliverers books on this site, and I will donate another copy to the kids. If you are an author and would like to donate copies of your book, leave a comment on this post or message me on Facebook and we can work out the details.

On the writing front, I've worked out the general arc of the story for The Deliverers 4. It took a while, but I'm pretty satisfied with it. I'm now filling in the details of the story line. It's looking pretty good. Things are picking up. Eric and friends will be getting to the heart of what's threatening the universe. Mix in a little historical fiction elements and I think we'll have an entertaining book!

My brain's telling me it's almost time to start writing chapter one. I'll let things stew in my head until after my

last show on December 1st and then get started. I hope to have the first draft completed by September or October. We'll see. As always, I'll be sure to keep you up to date on my progress.

The illustration for the cover of The Deliverers 3: The Golden Dragon of Ang is looking really good. Daniel Vogel is doing a great job. The cover should be ready by the end of the year.

Appearance Alert:  I will be at the 28th annual Holiday Festival FBO Newtown Youth and Family Services at Edmund Town Hall in Newtown, CT.

What's Elizabeth Reading? Incantation

This week, young reader Elizabeth is here to tell us a little bit about a book she's been reading. Incantation, by Alice Hoffman is a book that I am not ffamiliar with, so I am anxious to find out a little bit about it. Let's see what Elizabeth has to say.

Here's what Elizabeth says the book is about.

"I am someone 

I never would have imagined. 

A secret. 

A dream... 

body and soul. 

Burn me. 

Drown me. 

Tell me lies. 

I will still be who I am."

                                                     -ESTRELLA DEMADRIGAL 

                               SPAIN 1500

This book takes place in England in the 1500's. Estrella is the main character of the story. She is passionate about what she believes. She enjoys her life with her grandmother, mother, grandfather, and her best friend right next door. But all around her, everybody else is not having as carefree lives as she. Different religions were unjustly treated. Jews and Muslims were treated horribly! I mean, the book said that Jews were locked in at night for goodness sake.

Estrella will be made to question her beliefs, question who she is, and question where her family's loyalties lie. In the end, she will be forced to make a hard decision concerning her and her grandmother's future. This story is great for people who want to know what it was like to live in different time periods in history. There is not a lot of dialogue, but the story still goes into great depth and detail. I loved this book and my only regret is that there is no sequel to this book that I know of because I would have loved to learn what happened to Estrella after the story ended.

So, how did Elizabeth rate Incantation, by Alice Hoffman?

She gave it four out of five blue dragons.

New Assignment

Hi all. Long time, no see. Sorry about skipping the last Writer's Week. The truth is, the past week was very rewarding and productive. I met with  illustrator Dan Vogel to review the progress on the cover for The Deliverers 3: The Golden Dragon of Ang. It's coming along great and will be complete by Christmas. I'll share it with you when it's all done.

This weekend, I had a book signing at the Barn gallery in New Fairfield. It was a beautiful day. I saw a number of old friends and made a couple new ones. To be honest, the turnout was less than I had hoped. For a while I was disappointed, but after a lot of thought and some prayer, I decided to take a big step.

You might say that I took a new Assignment from the Gatekeeper. The Gatekeeper is the guy in my books that gives different missions--Assignments--to Eric and the other Deliverers. For a little over a year now, I've toyed with thoughts of how I could use my books to help others. I say toyed with because I kept running up against a, "I can't give stuff away, I have to make money" roadblock in my head.

This weekend changed all that. I now realize that the most important thing is that I write books and that I share them with as many kids as possible. Not only that, but I should be looking to get books to kids that don't have many--or in some cases, any.

With that in mind, I will be donating books to the Salvation Army to be distributed to children in need. I'm going to start in my own backyard and hopefully expand over time. My local Salvation Army collects new toys for children whose parents can't afford presents at Christmas. There are about 500 families that have registered this year. Not all of these families have children of reading age, but most of them do.

I am hoping to donate books, my books and those of any children's authors who would like to donate, to as many of these families as possible. I will pay  for a bunch myself using money that I've made from previous shows this month. From now on, when I sell a Deliverers book face to face or on this website, I will donate a second Deliverers book to the Salvation Army.

That's my mission and my Assignment this holiday season. I've posted it at the top of my blog, along with a donation button. If you would like to donate some cash to the cause, please do. The Deliverers 1 costs about $4 and the Deliverers 2 costs about $5 to produce, if you need a donation guideline. All funds donated (after Paypal's small processing fee) will go towards the purchase of books for kids in need. If you'd like a great book in the bargain, then go to my Store, buy a copy of book 1 or book 2 (or both), and I'll deliver a second copy to the Salvation Army. I'll personalize it with a book plate that tells the recipient it was donated by whomever you name.

I'm going to start small, but hopefully this will grow over time. I'd love to be able to offer a range of titles. If you are a children's author, please consider donating 5, 10, 25, however many copies you can. I promise they will find good homes. Email me at gregslomba@hotmail.com and we can work out the details. Thanks!

What's Abigail Reading? Forever Amber Brown

Abigail has been spending some time with an old friend this week, Amber Brown. She told us about another book in this series earlier this year. This time, she's been reading Forever Amber Brown, by Paula Danziger. Let's see what she has to say.

Here's what Abigail says the book is about.

This book is about Amber Brown who is in fourth grade. The characters are Amber Brown, her best friend, Justin, her mother, and Max. The setting is Justin's house.

First, Amber Brown, her mom, and Max were going bowling. Max helped Amber with her bowling skills. In the first game, Amber got a 42. When Amber was about to throw the ball, she saw a little girl fall down as she approached the lane.

Then, her teacher Mrs. Holt asked Amber to stay after class so she could talk to her. Her teacher told her that since she did not turn in her book report on time, Mrs. Holt would have to give her a low grade. Amber felt unhappy.

Next, Amber and her friend Brandi were waiting for their moms to pick them up. When Amber's mom finally came, she got in the car. Her mom told her that Max had proposed to her. Then they went to the airport to visit Amber's friend, Justin, in Alabama. While they were there, Amber's mom thought and made a decision about whether or not to accept Max's proposal.

Finally, Amber's mom decided to marry Max!

So, Abigail, what do you think the main theme of the book is?

I think the theme is that sometimes things will change and not everything will be the same.

How many dolphins does Abigail give Forever Amber Brown, by Paula Danziger?

She gave it four out of five dolphins!

Poetry Corner: First in a Series?

For a while now, I've been thinking about introducing a new feature. I've tossed around a couple of ideas, but nothing really tickled my fancy. Then, in August or September as I was mowing the lawn, I had an idea. It's taken me until now to pluck up the courage to actually move forward with the idea.

A long time ago I used to write some poetry. This was back in high school and college. Being young there were a torrent of emotions running through me and I needed some way to express my hopes and fears. The result was some good, bad and mediocre poetry. I thought that it might be fun to post a poem every once in a while. If people like it, I'll continue to do it periodically. If not, it will just fade away.

But hey, this isn't all just about me. If any of you out there have a poem that you would like to share, let me know and I'll put it up in a Poetry Corner post, along with any back story you'd care to supply. Funny, but as I read some of these old poems from almost 30 years ago, I realize that some of the questions they ask have yet to be answered. I don't know if that's encouraging (life is all about the search for answers) or depressing (I haven't figured things out yet?).

Anyway, here's one from just after I graduated from college. I think I was beginning to realize that I wasn't in Kansas anymore!

Odyssey

The wind blew hard upon the sea,

The lightning flashed and I could see,

That what I was following was a myth

That had left me on the sea to drift.

I drifted about for a long time then,

Searching for my journey's end.

Trying to find my way back home.

Searching for it inside a poem.

Wondering what it all means.

Sometimes I believe it's just a dream,

And that I'll awake from the wind and surf

To find myself at peace on earth.

Other times it's all too real,

On the sea I can't conceal,

The emptiness I feel inside.

Sometimes I just want to hide

In a warm, dry place safe and sound.

Someplace where the surf can't pound.

Someplace where I can breathe calm air

And walk a while without a care.

Just a while there to rest

Before once again I go to test

The boiling waters of the sea

Always trying to solve life's mystery.

Well, there you are. There's more where that came from--if you'd like to read it. Let me know what you think. If you have a poem you'd like me to post, leave a message in the comments.

A Writer's Week #92: Plotting Along

Appearance Alert:  I will be holding a book signing on November 16th from 1:00 to 3:00 at the Barn Gallery in New Fairfield, CT. If you're in the area, stop by, I'd love to see you.

This has been a busy couple of weeks. Last weekend, I was the featured author at the CT Society of Santas' 4th annual arts and crafts festival. It was a two day event, which was a first for me. I was a little apprehensive, but also excited. After I arrived and set up, I took a stroll to check out the other vendors. I was really impressed with the quality.

The foot traffic the first day was disappointing. It was a beautiful day with temperatures pushing 70 degrees. Most people were out and doing things. I had a lot of fun, despite slow sales. My college roommate, Bill Bossert, and his wife Meg stopped by to chat and pick up a copy of Order of the Crystal Lion. It was great to see them.

After the slow traffic on Saturday, I approached Sunday with a mixture of hope and trepidation. Thankfully,

Sunday was a much better day from a sales perspective. I was visited by friends Lauren and Keegan Shaw and their adorable twins. All in all, I had a decent show. Sales were what I normally have in a one day show, but I made a lot of new friends, met a bunch of kids, and reconnected with some old friends. You can't ask for any more than that. I will definitely be back next year.

Meanwhile, on the writing front, I've been plotting along. I've been wrestling with the plot outline for The Deliverers 4 for a while now. This morning on my walk I think I hit upon the solution to the big sticking point. Someone is trying to change history. Eric and the Deliverers have to go back in time to stop this someone from trying to change history. They go back to the time of the revolution to a couple days before a battle that was fought in Eric's hometown. My problem was that I could not figure out how this individual manifests himself. This morning, I figured it out. Hopefully, the rest of the plotting will go smoothly and quickly! I'd like to start writing by the end of this month. I'll let you know how it's going next week.

What's Elizabeth Reading? Epic

Reading Crew member Elizabeth is back to tell us about another cool book that she's been reading. This time around, she's going to tell us about Epic, by Conor Kostick. Let's hear what she has to say about it.

Here's what Elizabeth says the book is about.

When I picked up Epic, I thought it would be another one of those books where somebody does something to save the world, "BOOM, KAPOW!!!" You know, the usual cheesy adventure story. But this book is anything but the usual. This book is mainly about Erik and a group of his friends. In the world they live in, violence is against the law. If you so much as hit somebody, you could be exiled on an island. The main way people solve disputes is on Epic. Epic is a game that is so realistic, it is like a world within a world.

The characters in the game lead an entire life of their own 24/7, even when nobody is actually playing. In Epic, you can't kill somebody else from New Earth unless you are in the arena. The arena is the only place where your character can die, but come back to life without losing any of their possessions. The only problem with this system is that it is turning into a tyranny. The Allocation Committee has been making choices for the "greater good." But when they exile Erik's parents for a slight act of violence done years and years ago, Erik takes action. With the help of his friends, Erik plans to stop the Committee, but if they should fail...the whole world inside and out of the game could lose everything...

I loved this book and it has really good morals and a great story line to go along with the awesome characters in the story!!

So, how did Elizabeth rate Epic, by Conor Kostick?

She gave it five out of five blue dragons.

Between the Lines: Goldilocks

I apologize for being AWOL this weekend. I was at a two day show and was running here, there and everywhere, so A Writer's Week went by the boards. I'll give you a full rundown of the show and everything that happens this week on Friday.

Now I've got a very special treat. Today, we get to chat with the golden girl of fairy tales herself, Goldilocks. Let's find out what she's got to say.

Greg:  Hello, my dear. How are things?

Goldilocks:  Very well, thank you. I was out walking today in the crisp fall air. Very refreshing, even though the leaves are mostly down now.

Greg:  I see. You like to take long walks in the woods, do you?

Goldilocks:  Why, yes I do. I walk all over the forest back home.

Greg:  Yes, so I've heard. Tell me, when you're out walking do you like to drop in on neighbors?

Goldilocks:  Huh? Oh, I think I see where this is going. Look, my lawyer told you people that I was not going to answer any question related to that incident.

Greg:  Incident? To what incident are you referring. I never mentioned any incident.

Goldilocks:  My lawyer warned me about coming on here. She said sooner or later you'd drag those bears into the conversation.

Greg:  I never mentioned them. But, since you did, why don't you tell us exactly what happened.

Goldilocks:  There's really nothing to tell. I was walking along through the woods when I came upon the most lovely little house. I would have kept right on going without a second thought, but I was hungry. I hadn't eaten a thing all day. Anyway, as I passed by there was the most delicious smell wafting out the window. I had to stop and check it out.

Greg:  Um, humm. So you smelled some yummy porridge and barged right in.

Goldilocks:  I did not barge in. I knocked--a couple of times. There was no answer. I was really hungry, so I tried the door. It was unlocked. I peeked inside and it appeared that no one was home.

Greg:  Yes, so you did what anyone else would. You closed the door and continued on your way, right?

Goldilocks:  Well, no. As I said, I was very hungry, so I went inside. There on the table were three bowls of porridge--a big one, a medium sized one and a wee little bitty one. No one seemed to be around, so I tried the big bowl. It was too hot. Then I tried the medium bowl and it was too cold. The little itty bitty one was just right, though, and I ate it all up.

Greg:  Yes, I'll bet you did. So, after ruining these poor people's meal you left, right?

Goldilocks:  Not quite. I had been walking a long time and porridge is not a particularly light meal on the stomach, so I felt the need to sit a little bit. I went into the living room and there were three chairs--a big one, a medium sized one and an itsy bitsy baby one.

Greg:  Let me guess. This big one and the medium one were not comfortable, so you wedged yourself into the tiny one.

Goldilocks:  Not exactly. The first two were uncomfortable, but when I went to sit in the smallest chair, it broke into pieces. Can you imagine? After that shattering experience I simply had to lie down somewhere.

Greg:  And that's when you went upstairs.

Goldilocks:  You're beginning to sound like that nasty police officer the bears called. If you must know, I did go upstairs to take a little nap. There were three beds--a big one, a medium one and a small baby-sized one. Thee big one was too hard, and the medium one was too lumpy, but the small one was a dream. It was so comfortable that I was asleep in seconds.

Greg:  So let me get this straight. You entered the house of a stranger without being invited, ate their food, broke their furniture, and slept in their bed. That's pretty bold of you if you ask me. 

Goldilocks:  But I'm Goldilocks. It's what I do. Why doesn't anyone get that but me? Anyway, when I woke up, there were three bears standing over me. The big one and the medium-sized one did not look very pleased, and the baby one was crying his eyes out because someone had eaten his porridge and broken his chair.

I told them I was terribly sorry and offered to have my parents pay for the damages, but no. They rag the police and I was taken down to the station. I tried to explain that i was Goldilocks and this is what I do, but no one wanted to hear it. My father had to come bail me out. Even he was not pleased. I don't know what this world is coming to when a tired, hungry little girl can't get a little rest and nourishment without everyone making such a fuss.

Greg:  I supposed we should not be surprised. After all, it's what you do, isn't if?

Goldilocks:  Why yes, yes it is. See, you do understand! It's been awfully nice chatting with you, but I simply must run. My hearing is set for an hour from now. If I'm lucky those bears will be hibernating and won't show. Ta, ta!